How to Pass a Drug Test If You Smoke Marijuana
So you’ve smoked weed but you have to pass a drug test. What’s worse is that if it’s for work and you live in Wyoming, where being caught under cannabis influence entails 90 days of imprisonment and $100 fine. Or you could live in Alabama, where you can face even harsher punishments and longer jail times. Regardless, here’s what you must do in order to pass a drug test after smoking marijuana, particularly a pre-employment drug screening.
This article isn’t advocating cheating or dishonesty with your employer, but you face stiff fines, up to a year or more of imprisonment, a possible misdemeanor case on your record, and a surefire way of not getting hired when you test positive for cannabis. You just got to do what you’ve got to do.
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Urinalysis and Whatnot
Marijuana Stays in Your System for 30 Days: Like with athletic drug tests, a pre-employment urinalysis screening test usually punishes weed smokers severely even though meth and coke addicts get a free pass because those drugs only show up on a test 72 hours of use. To be more specific, if you have to smoke a toke, do it at least a month before the test or not at all since you’ll need to flush out those marijuana remnants somehow. If you can stop smoking weed for thirty days then do it.
Improvisation: Then again, after a long day’s work, nothing refreshes the mind like a big, green bowl or a bit of dank hash. Also, if it’s a surprise inspection or if you were informed for less than thirty days that you’ll have a test and you’ve already smoked, you’re not necessarily screwed yet. Regardless, improve isn’t just for comedians, apparently. It’s also for marijuana smokers who want to be able to take ten to fifteen tests and always pass them every time even though you were high out of your mind 24 hours ago. Usually, it involves using someone else’s urine.
Taking a Fake Leak: You’ll still be given privacy when taking a leak, so do what some footballers do and put in reserve urine when you’re not high and then take a bag of it with you under your leg and pee on the container with the bag during the test so you’d have a healthy sample to present to authorities. But you need to collect urine when you’re not smoking weed to make this work. You can also get a free urine sample from someone else since it’s urine for testing not for DNA analysis or anything.
Things to Remember: Get friends to take leaks for you that don’t smoke weed. Have that urine be within the right temperature (don’t put it in your freezer or something). For your information, you can buy fake stuff online to pass off as your urine, but why do that when the real thing is readily available for free? Have a buddy fill up your non-lubricated condom, seal that up, then go to the facility with a container and put that urine there (they won’t be watching you pee). Put the sample somewhere warm and somewhere that won’t leak into your pants or dashboard as well.
If you want a complete guide, you might want to check on this “how to pass a drug test for marijuana” book in Amazon: